Relationships

There are two weeks of school left, which is good for all of you because I’ll have to find something new to whine about, but in the mean time it’s got me thinking about a few things.

Earlier in the year, i took part n my first theatrical performance. It was great fun. I was playing a very minor part but the thrill of being on a proper stage and acting outside of a drama classroom more then made up for it.
During the course of the production, i made a few new friends, and because I saw them on a regular basis, everything was great. But then of course, the show ended.

The end of a show is a strange feeling. Part of you is relieved that it’s over and there are no more late night rehearsals, no more listening to the same songs again and again and AGAIN, no more stressed out director and long periods of waiting around. But another part, a much stronger part, feels the nostalgia. You don’t want it to end. You want to do it again, and again, and again. There’s a real sense of loss that comes with the ending of a production. It’s quite sad.

But I think beyond the show ending, there is another pang which is that inevitably, those friends you made and the interesting cool people you’ve met are going to vanish again. Not always, but in this case, I haven’t spoken to the friends i made in the production again since the night the show closed. Not intentionally, we just have never seen each other, never had the chance, and even if we did, now that we’ve lost this common ground, i have to wonder if we’d have anything to talk about at all.

And that really makes me sad, because i really liked the people I met while doing the show. They really were some of the most diverse and interesting people i’ve ever met, and i think it would be really cool to stay friends with them. But i think, i suppose, in real life it just doesn’t work that way.

Thanks to the marvel of the internet, we’ve become ‘facebook friends’, but let’s be honest. What does that mean? We still don’t talk to each other, we still don’t see each other, we’re not going to play endless card games while sitting back stage and we’re not going to mess around with costumes so that a nun is wearing a bow tie and a fez. Those days are gone.

Another example. When i worked in a shop, i worked with a girl who i liked a lot. She was super cool, super sweet. We had a lot of fun working together. But when i quit my job, just like that, we lost contact. We don’t talk anymore, we don’t see each other anymore. It makes me sad.

The reason I bring this up is that when school ends, i wonder if it’ll be the same thing. Once that common ground is removed, am i going to see my classmates again? Are we going to stay in touch, for real, not just via facebook? Are we going to consider each other friends?

I don’t know, but to be honest, i doubt it.

I don’t have a best friend. I’ve tried over the years. but it’s usually a one sided thing, and eventually I became disenchanted with the concept of “best friends”. i think a best friend is a friend who can exceed the boundaries of ‘common ground’. Not necessarily a school friend or a work mate or a member of the same club. Someone who is just there, in your life.

The common ground of life.

How poetic. *Snort*.

If there’s anyone reading this who can relate, leave me a comment because i’d honestly love to hear about it. Is it possible to breach the boundaries and maintain these friendships? Or is it just a fact of life?

CIA!

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